I get so many enquiries for weight-loss, chronic pain and rehabilitation programs, but in reality, most people won’t take action. They stay where they are, the want to change but don’t. This is because they actually see more benefit in staying the same than changing. We are like a compass needle; it will only point in the direction of time. The mind will go back to direction North.
People constantly fail on goals such as diets because they get stuck, lost and feel overwhelmed. This is because a lot of the new habits they are trying to build, they actually hate doing. Hence most entrepreneurs have failed more times than most people have tried. You have to keep going. When you are lost, you do not know where you are going. When you are stuck, you don’t know how to get out, and when you are overwhelmed, you have no strategy.
Positive thinking, being motivated, or even acknowledging negative emotions do not solve everything. We need to observe and understand our emotions and their relations to our behaviours. If you are unwilling to the stay the same, you must be willing to do the work. Having hope only makes you hopeless. Again, take action, not reaction.
Most of us do not know how to control our state. Hence our addictions to food, sugar, alcohol, prescriptive and recreational drugs, internet or social media. Knowledge is not power, applied knowledge is power. Hence just talking about mental health and depression will result in the same state as the behaviour, as action has not taken place.
We tend to follow patterns and peer groups that mainstream media conform to. This is because the other direction is uncomfortable. Growth and change are always uncomfortable. In the West we tend to rely on materialistic products or addictive behaviours, such as food and drink to make us feel happy. But it’s the simple things in life which are true happiness.
Here is a test for you: Write down 15 things that make you feel happy today.
Are you taking accountability for yourself? Are you just floating through life or are you living life to the full? Are you ready to take on new life challenges and change addictive behaviours that do not get the result you want? Are you ready to challenge your belief system? After all, any belief worth living is worth questioning. Question everything you watch, listen to, read and the food that you eat. These have a direct corelation to your mindset and psychology. Are your beliefs holding you back? We are 100% responsible for how we feel, think and behave. Every time we point the finger at others, there are three pointing back.
We are a society of overthinkers (left brain), yet under doers. The easy way out does not take a lot of work, but real work occurs when we change our behavioural patterns. Everyone you meet is a mirror of yourself. We mirror other behaviours; resentment happens when you can only see the negatives. Look at what you have learnt, rather than what you have lost.
When we change our behaviour and our habits, we not only benefit ourselves, but we benefit our friends, family and colleagues around us. When you level up and take responsibility, we all level up and take responsibility. Take action, rather than reaction. Transformation of the body, mind and soul is not a spectator sport, it means you have to do the work and get involved.
We are schooled through what is called Transactional Analysis, which means we play the child, and the adult authority plays the parent. Therefore, we never have to ask real questions or do critical thinking, as someone else will always do it for us.
Everything starts with radical honesty. You are a collection of your behaviours and belief systems. We are the quality of the questions we ask and the quality of conversations that we have. We all have our personal story, as Buddha said we have all suffered and have to partake in suffering. But when do we move away from our overwhelming story and create an exit route, a plan and strategy for change?
Where attention goes energy flows. BE careful what you read, put in your mouth and in your brain. The news is full of negativity, fear and drama. When we have better emotions, we no doubt have a better mindset and develop skills to cope with life. People who wander from drama to drama have no sense of purpose, no legacy, mission, goals or targets. Get your nose out of everyone else’s business. We all want to avoid discomfort, but a challenge-free life with no problems does not exist. Instead of saying things happen to me, say things happen for me. Be powerful, instead of powerless. The victim mindset is one of blame, anger, frustration and resent. Your perception is where you are physically, mentally and emotionally.
Anxiety is on the increase, it will happen if we are not living by basic human principles of thinking, breathing, sleeping, movement, nutrition and stress. Where you are in your life right now is a reflection of how you managed your challenges. Our past is a gift; from it we learn to change our future and our life.
Change your behaviour and you will change your result. Your mental health and well-being is also a reflection of your gut. Your focus is controlled by your questions. Negativity, separation and segregation arises when we have a different belief system or view on others. We want everyone else to think and be the same as us. Let people be different but don’t ostracise them, this is a low-level emotion. We all want to be liked and fit in with our peers and friends. This is known as conformity. But how about you raising your peer group by raising your standards? Get yourself informed, start reading and learning. Believe in your own ability. Struggling in life is normal, but suffering is optional. We chose how to react to a situation. Don’t let people have your anger, challenge your perception and learn to be a good listener. We have two ears and one mouth. We can train our mind, how we train our body.
As you improve and get better in life, others will too. Raise your vibration, focus on the language that you use. How do you talk to yourself? Don’t make your illness, dis-ease or your problem your identity. Don’t complain on a Monday morning at work if you have eaten rubbish all week. You will feel lethargic, de motivated, uninspired and non-creative. Hang out with 10 people who are complaining, and you will become number 11.
Start your day by creating a strategy and use your time wisely. You can change your vibration by helping others. This will give you the freedom, opportunity and control that are essential for happiness. Challenge yourself to grow.
Change your behaviour and you will change your habits.
Paul Chek podcasts