If you want to make progress in life you need to change your perception and reaction. Everything happens for me to improve my growth and contribution or everything happens to me (victim archetype). If you want your family and friends to change, you need to change yourself first. We are always progressing through pain and experience. If myself and my well-being are off, it becomes more challenging for myself and my team. When we cannot cope with challenge, it shows our lowest level of training. Our behaviour and persistent is demonstrated by our actions. Remember everyone’s reaction in life is where they are at. You can transcend your anger and go beyond the range of our own limits. Looking back at problems means we are not solving enough new ones.
Top 8 tips to become powerful rather than powerless…
- I never need to be motivated or incentivised to do things that I value most.
- If you don’t fill your day with high priority activities that inspire you, your day will gets filled with low priority distractions that don’t inspire you.
- Loving people for who are they are and what they are, rather than trying to change to them.
- The moment we are confused, we lose power.
- Your purpose is to shine, not to shrink.
- You will never value any relationship unless you can see how and what they value helps you on your journey.
- When we are resentful, we are too proud to see what is inside of them, is inside of us.
- There are no positives or negatives in people, only traits and learned patterns
If we want maximum growth in life, we need to be prepared for challenge, praise and criticism.
Have you heard of the map pf consciousness, it’s the tipping point between power and force? Having the courage to go into a challenging situation and not wait for support or the answer, takes guts. The people who don’t get it, just melt like a puddle. When we start to think negative thoughts, we need to remember that repetition is the mother of all skill. Bad habits only occur because we have practiced the habit a lot. Life is a subjective experience. It’s never about the money. If you get upset with other people for not meeting your expectations, its nothing to do with the outer world, it’s your inner world, in fact your perception and reaction to the situation.
We form a judgement by comparing ourselves to others. Are you knowing or doing? All stress happens to see if I can walk the walk and talk the talk. As Bruce Lee says: “You can’t learn to swim by living on dry land”. Every day we are being tested by challenges. Life will only throw us what we can cope with. If you are car mechanic, expect car problems, if you work in a hospital expect sick people. We strive to be ethnocentric but struggle and become egocentric. We make everything about us. Our expectations are not being met, so we complain and moan.
Each day make someone smile. Make other people feel significant. Help people get what they want, then you will get what you want. Fit your own oxygen mask first. We are too focused on how expectations are not being met, so less egocentric and more ethnocentric. Your life is a movie, you are the star of your own show. There is only social anxiety when we think we are the star of other people’s movie. We are lucky enough to play our own role, our own drama.
What makes a great superhero? It’s the opposites, the villains in life, the super villains. Albert Einstein once said, “The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or a hostile universe.” Is the world you live in hostile or friendly? How do you look at it? It’s up to you to decide. Every single day I make that decision. I wake up and ask myself: “Do I live in a good world or a bad world?” Do I feel the world is against me or for me? Do things happen for me or to me. If you avoid the discomfort of getting out of your comfort zone, you will end up there anyway. Someone that can handle problems in life has been uncomfortable and has taken risk by their own choice.
When something goes wrong, we self soothe rather than step up. Do you place your own self-worth in other people’s hands? You cannot have peace of mind if you are caught up in the good opinions of others. The more you grow as a person, the more criticism you will attract. Don’t apologize for who and what you are.
Resistance V acceptance
Letting go of friction, anything you are stressed about you are resisting. Stress is resistance to friction. What you think should or should not be, creates stress. How often do you complain verbally out loud each day and mentally inside each day? Creating friction is wasted energy, that could be used to take action and could be the very thing that gets you moving. If you are complaining about something more than twice, it’s time to take action. What we resist persists. How many of us compare our body to a younger body? Catch yourself each time you complain or say something negative.
Ask better questions of yourself as the brain is a problem-solving machine, that needs to be challenged.
When something happens out of your control, ask yourself:
- What haven’t I noticed?
- What else does this mean?
- In what ways this could benefit me?
- How can this benefit other people?
- What could this potentially lead to that could add value?
All you can do with your life is experience it. You can’t shrink, you gotta shine. It’s not the job that is causing you stress, it’s your perception and unmet expectations about the job giving you the problem. Creative people don’t switch off , they just need to switch to something else instead.
Paul Mort – Unstoppable